Prayers/ good wishes for Milo...

Holy Mary mother of Jesus this has been one hell of a week and after reading this you will be forgiven for thinking that I shouldn't own a pet on account of bad luck. Milo appears to have broken both his tail and his back paw. There is a bad cell in battery of our car which requires either jump starting the car or pushing it to get it going. Today the car was parked on a slight incline on the in our drive way, I was standing in front of the car and my mom was rolling the car back to get it started when I heard the most awful scream. I looked down at the wheel and all I saw was Milo's tail sticking out from under it. I began yelling at my Mom to move forward. My Mom does not handle situations like this well- she couldn't start the car because it was dead. She went into hysterics, got out the car and started running up and down screaming. I started to manually lift the car up and actually got it a little bit off the ground, but not enough for Milo to get out. Two guys who had been working on the garden came running to the back of the car and started to push it back up the incline, meanwhile my Mom had gotten enough of her senses back to get back in the car and lift the handbrake. Once he was free Milo shot like a bullet into the house, ran up the stairs and into the geyser cupboard in my room with me chasing after him. It took me ten minutes to get him out. We raced him to the animal welfare, where they sedated him and will be keeping him over night until the vet comes tomorrow. These were the same people who gave us hell just because I wanted Milo vaccinated but didn't have the money to do it. And they were as snooty as hell to us this time all because we are not "underprivileged" enough.

This all has been the most horrific shock: Milo's screams and the seeing his little tail sticking out of the wheel will be forever be burned into my memory and the guilt is overwhelming. There were tuffs of his fur lying around the car. Not to mention that I think I did some serious damage to myself by trying to lift the car up and then chasing after him. It's been 3 days since my lumbar puncture/spinal tap and when I woke up this morning I still had the headache and I was deaf in one ear. After this little fiasco the pain has become excruciating...I can't cry, laugh, sneeze with out a horrible white hot thunderbolt shooting through my head. But I think it's probably nothing compared to what my poor little Milo went through.

I will only know tomorrow morning what will happen to Milo. The horrible people at the animal welfare have made it clear that we will cost us....a lot, even though I have told them I am unemployed at the moment. The one woman made a catty remark that "this isn't a free service we are giving". I wonder what they would do to Milo if I said I just couldn't pay...would they hold him ransom? put him down? or just leave him the way he was?. The dumb cow could see how upset I was but she was still being such a bitch.

A very sweet little blessing happened while I was there and this just testifies the unconditional love you can receive from a pet. They had just put Milo into his cage on the floor and I put my fingers in to stroke his head so he could go to sleep. I was crying and was in immense pain when I became aware of someone beside. An old black dog had come to sit beside me, he then put his paw on my knee and lent into me. I put my arm around him and he tried to lick me. We sat there for about five minutes just like that, somewhere in between another cat wandered up and began to rub itself against my knee. I hope those people know what a privilege it is to do what they are doing.

I realise most of you are not of a religious nature... I don't care, whatever your creed please pray for my precious fur ball tonight. If  you are not the praying kind make a wish that he will be better soon. I will be going back to hospital on Monday to find out what the hell is going with me....my baby fur ball and I both in the same boat tonight.

What a lovely afternoon

  It's late- most of my posts are written late just check the times they are posted. I am sitting here alone pondering, of all things, why some people are more accident- prone then others. Just got up a while ago only to knock over a 500ml cup full of water, on my way to get a mop I tripped over a chair in the dark, stubbing my toe- ouch!. Lastly on my way back, the door handle caught on my sleeve and snagged my jersey. This all happened in the space of two minutes. It kind of reminded me of one of those "Carrying on" shows. And maybe I shouldn't mention that one of my rabbits peed on my bed- I only discovered this AFTER I sat down.

On the other hand I had a great afternoon. Most of it was spent making my little cousins belly- laugh by acting like a dork. Sometimes I can't believe that they actually think the lame tricks I pull are funny- seriously I've had them rolling around the floor on occasions- but I love making them laugh. Now matter how depressed I am I can feel my spirits lift every time I hear their squeals

We then went to pick flowers in the park and ate gooey fudge. Watching the youngest one run around chasing a white butterfly was one of the best moments.

Spending time with them was one of the best things I could have done today. Right afterwards I had my 6th CBT session with Dr. Shaw. Today was the day that I had to painfully recount my breakdown in America. I was kind of dreading this session because it is so emotionally exhausting and talking about that time still hurts a great deal. But I walked in there after having spent the day laughing with my girls and I felt ready to take on the elephant in the room. It was still hard, but drawing from the strength of being loved unconditionally by two little people made it possible for me to cope. What an amazing effect people can have on each other- even when someone is too young even to realise it

x

 Gooey fudge!!